Man Of Me
by obsessedwithstabler
Summary: I don't know what it is you do, but every time I'm holding you, I know what my heart is for. I'm the one you lean on, got to be strong. It ain't just about me anymore.


This is a songfic using the Gary Allan song Man Of Me (which of course is NOT mine). It is Shules, and there is a little bit of smut. Enjoy!

Disclaimer: Not mine!

PsychPsychPsychPsychPsych

In the deepest, darkest part of the night, Shawn Spencer was alone with his thoughts.

In his bed, he lay on his back and stared up at the ceiling. Beside him, Juliet O'Hara slept peacefully with her head on his chest and one slender leg resting between his legs. His arm was wrapped firmly around her, and his fingers traveled mindlessly through her thick tresses.

Before he met her, this was something he never would have done. Before he met her, he usually went to a date's home for the night and was gone long before the sun rose. Sometimes he'd even slip out once he had got what he wanted, making up a lame excuse while he searched for his pants.

He never did that with Juliet.

Even in high school, he would 'borrow' some unsuspecting guy's car, pick up the wildest chick he could find, and screw her right there in some nearly empty parking lot. Sometimes it was even daylight, and anyone could see them. But he didn't care about her modesty, or his.

He cared about Juliet's.

Sometimes he thought all that high school taught him was how to get girls. Well, maybe middle school. He snickered as he remembered the first kiss he had, and the first time he got to second base. He was in the eighth grade, and she was in high school. Angry at her boyfriend and parents, she had made out with him in his backyard. Luckily Henry was still on shift.

Not that he would have cared if Henry had caught them.

_Well, high school got me educated_

_Still when I graduated_

_I didn't have a clue_

_Did a stint in the Navy_

_They did their best to break me_

_Somehow I made it through_

After he graduated high school (just barely) he was so sick of his father that the moment he had his diploma, he had bought a second hand motorcycle, loaded up a couple of his things, and hit the road after saying goodbye to Gus. There was no point in sticking around. Gus was going off to college, and Shawn was determined to do whatever he wanted.

Through all the traveling, he never lost contact with his best friend, though. He drove all over the country, taking jobs when he had to have money and sometimes having sex with a moment so he could get a few hours of sleep in a comfortable bed.

He spent four years doing this, until Gus graduated from college and had his degree. Then, after some pushing on Gus' part, he moved back to Santa Barbara. And even after he was back, he still didn't contact his father.

His fingers toyed with Juliet's hair, and he grinned at the soft sound she made.

It was a couple of years still before he even laid eyes on Juliet O'Hara. And when he did, he knew his life would never be the same again.

_I've had some hard knocks_

_I've been around the block_

_But baby, I believe_

He was an immature man, but he had never believed in love at first sight. Lust at first sight, yes. Not love at first sight. And he wouldn't even go so far to say that he loved Juliet the minute he laid eyes on her.

But he did find her fascinating and beautiful, and that was something that he rarely experienced. Then he got to know her on a more personal level, and he was a better person for it.

Sighing softly, Juliet pressed herself closer to Shawn. Her hand slipped under his t-shirt and slid over his bare abdomen, making him inhale sharply.

With a low growl, Shawn rolled her onto her back and pinned her to the mattress.

Juliet just laughed and hooked her leg around his. She loved antagonizing him like this.

Capturing her slender hands in his, he held them above her head and began kissing his way down the soft skin of her neck.

Outside, rain began to fall, and a peal of lightning briefly lit up the room.

Neither of them noticed it.

_That loving you made a man of me_

_Loving you made a man of me_

Friday night, Shawn was sitting beside his best friend at what used to be one of his favorite local haunts.

He could remember a time not too long ago when he walked in and could catch the eye of any female in the place. It didn't matter to him if she was already there with someone else. Sometimes he'd even make a game of how fast he could get her number before her boyfriend realized what was happening.

He scoffed to himself. He had even been known to be in a 'committed relationship' and still chasing after other women.

That was all in the past since he started dating Juliet.

Throwing down a twenty, he grinned at his best friend. "I think I'm gonna get out of here, man." He knew that Juliet was at her apartment, and there was a very good chance that she was lonely and in the shower.

Gus was eyeing a woman across the bar and almost missed his friend's words. "See you tomorrow, Shawn."

Shawn slapped Gus on the back before leaving the bar. It never even crossed his mind that he had given up a possible wild night out on the town.

With Juliet, he wasn't giving up anything.

SJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJSJ

Sunday afternoon, much to his chagrin, Juliet invited Henry over for lunch and to catch up. She knew that their relationship was strained at best, but she also knew it had come a long way since Shawn became a consultant for the Santa Barbara Police Department.

Henry arrived promptly at one, and while Juliet was putting the last touches on the meal, he sat down on the couch with his son.

Shawn nodded at his dad. "Hey."

"Hey." Glancing toward the kitchen, Henry rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "I'm glad you finally took my advice about telling Juliet how you feel."

"Dad…"

"Come on, Shawn. She's a wonderful young lady, and she does you a lot of good." In fact, out of any of the women in Shawn's life Henry had actually met, Juliet was by far Henry's favorite. She was beautiful, smart, and didn't let Shawn get away with a lot of stupid crap. Yes, she was good for his son. "You won't find another one like her."

"I know I won't."

"Maybe you should marry her."

Shawn groaned, silently thanking Juliet when she announced that lunch was done.

He didn't need his father going all soft and ruining the meal when he found out that Shawn was already thinking about marriage.

_Raising hell, racing cars_

_Closing down the local bars_

_That's what I used to do_

_Family told me, "Settle down._

_Find yourself some solid ground_

_Where you can put down some roots."_

Sunday night, after a movie and a makeout session on the couch, Shawn sat in their bed and watched as Juliet set the alarm clock for five a.m.

She smiled at him as she set the clock down, then joined him in the bed. "What?"

He grinned. "You're beautiful."

A light blush colored her cheeks. "Shawn, flattery will get you nowhere."

"I think I have proven many times just where flattery will get me." He had proven it in the shower, in the kitchen, in an empty interrogation room at the precinct…

Juliet grabbed a bottle of lotion and squirted a generous amount into her palm. Then she began applying it to her long legs. "Right."

He focused his attention on her beautiful legs. "I know." Leaning over, he nuzzled her neck with his nose.

Her eyes closed and she let out a soft noise. "Shawn…"

Not one to be deterred, Shawn slipped his hand under the t-shirt she wore. "My clothes always look better on you than they ever do on me."

"Hmm…"

_Back then I thought love _

_Was only sissy stuff_

_But now I see _

Taking the lotion out of her hand, he set the bottle aside. Then he ran a large hand over her leg. "You're so soft…" He lightly kissed the hollow of her neck. "So beautiful."

"Shawn…"

His hand moved slowly, caressing her thigh with a feather light touch. "Yes, Jules?"

She leaned into him, letting his hands move until there was nothing between their bodies.

As soon as their clothes were gone, Shawn pulled Juliet into his lap and wrapped his arms around her. He had never been the possessive type until her. Now that she was his, he felt a most primal need to claim her in every way he could think of.

Juliet smiled and rested her forehead against Shawn's. "I love you, Shawn."

He ran his hands up and down her bare back. "I love you, too, Jules."

Sighing contently, she kissed him tenderly. His hands moved to her hips, and they slowly started to move together.

_That loving you made a man of me_

_Loving you made a man of me_

Shawn knew something was wrong before Juliet even walked into their apartment. He had decided to make a special dinner for just the two of them, and had even bribed Gus into picking up a very nice bottle of wine to go along with it.

But when Juliet called and said she was going to be late, he could hear it in her voice. So he sat down on the couch and waited.

Finally, a little after seven, the front door opened. Without even thinking, Shawn got to his feet and hurried over to her. He wrapped his arms firmly around her and held her tight.

Shuddering, Juliet buried her face in Shawn's chest.

Moving carefully, Shawn guided her over to the couch and urged her to sit down. Then he sat down beside her and drew her back into his arms. "What happened, Jules?" he whispered into her hair.

She sniffled. "Shawn… I'm pregnant."

He pulled back and stared at her, shocked. "You're…pregnant?"

She nodded, looking almost fearful.

He placed his hand to her flushed cheek. "Is that why you're crying?"

"I know you're not ready for a family…"

"That doesn't mean I don't want one, Juliet," he interrupted gently. "Jules…I love you. More than anything. And a baby…" He smoothed his hand gently over her hair. "I know we weren't expecting this. But it's a baby, sweetheart. A part of me and you."

That was the most beautiful thing he had ever said to her, and she couldn't stop herself from smiling. "Really?"

"Really." He pulled her into his arms and held her tight. Since Juliet, his life had ceased to be his own.

But it didn't seem to be such a bad thing.

_I don't know what it is you do_

_But every time I'm holding you_

_I know what my heart is for_

_I'm the one you lean on_

_Got to be strong_

_It ain't just about me anymore_

Seven months later, Shawn felt helpless and lost as he stood by Juliet's side while she labored to deliver their baby. She simultaneously screamed at him and begged him not to go, so he just stood there, holding her hand and hoping it was enough.

"Here she comes…" The doctor nodded, smiling. "Keep pushing, Juliet. You're doing great."

Juliet screamed again, pushing as hard as she could.

Suddenly there was a tiny, messy person in the doctor's hands, and Shawn felt the oxygen being sucked from his lungs as he heard his daughter cry for the first time.

The next thing he knew, she was in his arms. Instinctively he held her tight, and once again his entire world as he knew it was forever changed.

_Well, goodbye to my blind immaturity_

_Loving you made a man of me_

Four years later, Shawn was sitting by Juliet's hospital bed and holding her hand. The door opened, and he grinned as Lassiter carried little Cecilia in.

Shawn got to his feet. "Hi, baby…"

Lassiter handed the young girl to Shawn. "She's excited about meeting her brother."

"I'm sure she is," Shawn said with a grin. He led Lassiter over to his son's isolette. "Here he is, sweetheart. That's your brother, Michael." He looked at his little boy's hospital bracelet. Michael Carlton Spencer. Juliet had been determined to name their son for Lassiter after he saved her life while she was pregnant. Shawn had readily agreed with the idea.

Cecilia pouted. "He's little."

"I know he is, princess. But he'll get bigger."

She looked dubious. "Really?"

Shawn offered her his pinkie finger. "Pinkie swear."

Giggling, she took his pinkie. "I'm gonna get ice cream!"

"Really? Is Uncle Carlton going to take you?"

"Yeah!"

"Well, I guess you better get over there." He set her on the floor and watched with a grin as she ran back to Lassiter and threw her arms around his legs.

Lassiter leaned over and lifted her into his arms. "We'll be back soon."

"I'll let Jules know."

The Irish detective carried Shawn's daughter out of the room, and as the door closed, Shawn turned back to the isolette and studied his brand new son.

When he met Juliet O'Hara, he had still been a boy. But loving her, and now their children, had made a man out of Shawn Spencer.

_I'd still be only lost and lonely as a boy can be_

_Can't you see _

_That loving you made a man of me_

_Loving you made a man of me_

_It made a man of me_

_It made a man of me_

The End!

A/N: I like to think that Juliet is slowly making a man out of Shawn. LOL. Thanks for reading, and please review!


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